Table 3.

Participant quotes related to the third theme "Leaving coercion"

"A lasting imprint" subtheme

"it is some things that are still part of you, but it's something I'll never forget."

"And the thing about you becoming so sensitive to the sounds around you, because then you just become like an animal that can hear okay this is it. I think that if you experience it once or twice then okay. But so many times, then it leaves some traces."

"Changing perspectives" subtheme

"When you then … when you come more out on the other side, then you are able to see that what they did back then, at least some of it, has helped to you still being here"

"Hmm … I think now I'm able to look at it a little more objectively, um … because it's something else when you're exposed to it than when you look at it from the outside. Um, but from the outside then I would be able to rationalize that I was is situations where there was simply no other option than that."

"So, I also think it's a bit about that I … that I … I have gotten this self-care, um … and dare to take [use] it and treat myself properly."

" I'm not as destructive towards myself anymore, um, as I was back then. Because they gave me involuntary treatment, but that was also a way of punishing myself just like the eating disorder was, and the self-harm and all those things. It was somehow that I had to punish myself. And now, I don't punish myself."