Table 1.

Example of Tailoring Strategies and Tailored Messages

Strategy	Sample Message (tailored elements in bold)
Personalization
Cancer type and dyad relationship	When someone has prostate cancer it affects the whole family, especially the spouse When someone has breast cancer, it affects the whole family, includin the adult children.
Feedback
High communication	Compared to other married couples, you have strong communication. You share your feelings with each other and know how important it is to be open.
Low communication	Talking about personal feelings is not easy for everyone. As you face cancer together, it may be important to find ways to let each other know how you are feeling.
Content-Matching	Example: communication barriers: You’ve told us that [barrier] is a challenge for you. You might be interested in some ways other couples managed this same issue.
Hiding feelings	Sometimes it helps to start by sharing just one feeling. It can help to start slowly to “get practice” talking about how you feel.
Too critical	Try to use “I” statements Say how you are feeling and try not to blame the other person. For example, say “I’m frustrated that the house is so messy,” instead of “You never clean up.”
Finding time	Try making an “appointment” to talk to each other about important topics. Having a set time on the calendar can help especially when everyone feels so busy.