Table 4.

Older person perspective.

Dealing-with-loss practices	Examples	Factual orientation	Normative orientation
Accepting ailments as a part of daily life	Ignoring pain or ailments; avoiding thinking about future health goals.	Medical facts that construct frailty need to be ignored, e.g., deliberately ignoring potential signs of physical loss.	Past-and-present oriented: reconciling with loss of physical capacities from the past in the present.
Putting their own situation in perspective	Comparing self to others who are worse off (e.g., sister with dementia, daughter in poor health, late friends).	Social and emotional facts need to be placed in perspective, e.g., toning down their own daily experience of loss.	Past-and-present: reconciling with all types of loss, e.g., physical capacities, social network, living situation.
Living day by day and trying to continue doing what they used to do	Not using a walker; providing informal care to partner; cooking despite becoming blind.	Medical and social facts that construct frailty need to be valued considered in relation to identity threats.	Past-and-present-oriented: maintaining their identities and lifestyles as built in the past; maintaining a feeling of self and purpose in life.
Grieving	Reminiscing about lost loved ones, lost social relations, meaningful activities that are no longer possible, e.g., traveling, reading, ice skating.	Social and emotional facts that construct frailty need explicit acknowledgment and attention, e.g., on one's daily experience with loss.	Past-and-present-oriented: being attentive to present grief caused by past loss.